foods I've never tried

Don't get too excited. I'm not talking about poi or insects. I'm talking about stuff in the supermarket.
Nothing exotic.

I've never had a single bite of:

Hot Pockets

a Hot Pocket. In any flavor. Not even in college. In college I ate rice cakes and chicken legs and I weighed about 88 pounds. It was great.

I've never tasted -


Green Bean Casserole. You know, the one with the Cream of Mushroom canned soup in it?
Never had it. Which is not to say my mother's repertoire did not include some interesting dishes. She made a mean chicken leg smothered in French dressing.

I have never purchased


a Tyson chicken product.
And this, I see now, is a pulled pork something-or-other. No.

Chunky Soup

When I was 4 or 5 my father told me that Chunky Soup smelled like armpits.
I've never had the opportunity to disprove this.


On the commercial they say something like: oven to table in 4 minutes. I wouldn't know.


It has never occurred to me to have Spam. Even when my parents lived in Spam country.


Shocked? I've never tasted rice pudding either. Is it lumpy? Vanilla-ish? I don't think the texture would bother me - I like grits. Is tapioca like undercooked grits?


When I was little we lived with my grandmother. She ate pickled watermelon rind right out of the jar. She told me it was poison. I believe her to this day.

head cheese

Head cheese. Two words that should never be together in a sentence or my stomach. And there is no cheese in it. What's up with that?


Anonymous said…
I am very sorry to report that spam is often in my shopping trolley. I have NEVER eaten it. I think it smells like dog food, but it doesn't stop my husband...
Anonymous said…
I don't think you're missing anything by not having eaten any of those so-called foods.
Anonymous said…
peppermintpathcer - I think your forgiven because you used the word 'trolley' in the same sentence.

George Carlin says about head cheese - 'I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT THE SIGN'

Duyvken said…
hahaha, I don't think you've missed much. What's with putting a can of cream of mushroom soup in everything anyway?! I've heard of pickled watermelon rind, that's.... resourceful to say the least :-)
Joke said…
Rice pudding is good stuff, though. The texture is like risotto cooked soft, but the flavor is a clean and dairy sweet.

"Kozy Shack" is a worthy brand, and they sell it in tiny portions. You ought to try it, just to see how you feel about rice pudding.

Amy A. said…
A lot of these items got my gag reflex going. Just what you wanted to know, eh?

Doesn't look like you are missing out on much. I think I might try your rice cake and chicken leg diet, though. :)
Anonymous said…
I'm shocked you haven't ever had rice pudding. It is not my favorite, but, as the other commenter said, it is clean and dairy sweet and has some subtle spices. But the thought of Jell-o brand rice pudding does turn my stomach. Better to make it from scratch if you ask me...

When you say you lived in Spam Country, are you talking Austin, MN, or another general po-dunk rurality?

The pic of head cheese is disgusting...
Kathy Rogers said…
I'm glad you saved the grossest for last. Eeyew.

Do not buy rice pudding at the grocery store. Blech. Make your own rice pudding. Or find a good deli that knows what it's doing. I like rice pudding better than tapioca, but tapioca can be good, too.

Green bean casserole is good at the end of November. It cannot be eaten at any other time.

I hate rice cakes. Styrofoam.
Ali said…
Well I've done Spam (don't bother), rice pudding (good stuff) and I think hog's head cheese. Only we call it brawn. But I think it's the same.

My mother had occasional offal phases when we were growing up and made HER OWN!! AAAArgh. Although it actually tasted pretty good if you like that meaty jelly sort of thing. She still makes pressed tongue too. Okay, we are officially a family of odd bods now.
RW said…
Head cheese. No. Cannot even think about it. Whilst living in Sweden I did have Blood Pudding placed before me, out of hospitality I ate some of it.
Dani said…
OMG... I though I was the only one that made the Campbell's Soup/body odor connection.

I've never had rice pudding or tapioca, but I'm not adverse to trying it. The occasion has just never come up I guess.

My great grandmother used to send me to the store to buy her head cheese. I'm still scarred from that.
Anonymous said…
Jesus. That last picture is going to give me nightmares.
Anonymous said…
We are so simpatico. I am afraid of many of those "foods." I have eaten the green bean casserole, however. It was the only green veg. for many years at my husband's family's Thanksgiving dinner. It's not the worst "food," but certainly not the best.
Karla May said…
I can't speak for the "Old South" brand watermelon rind, but you should DEFINITELY try their pickled green baby tomatoes. They call them "Tomolives," and they are the bomb in martinis...
Anonymous said…
88 lbs???? That's anorexic!
I refuse to comment any of the stuff you listed.
Especially the last.
There's a lot of strange stuff around here by the end of December when pigs dearly fed all year round go get slaughtered.
barbra said…
Ditto for me on almost all of these.

Except I have had ONE Hot Pocket, like forever ago. One was more than enough.

And I have family members who make the green bean casserole. I don't get it - seems so unnecessary to do green beans that way. I prefer them steamed. (Although I guess it uses canned green beans - I don't buy canned green beans.)
Julie said…
The only thing that I have tried on here are the hot pockets.

I will never ever eat SPAM or rice pudding.
Anonymous said…
Mmm, tomolives. Yum!

My mom used to buy "deviled ham" back in the day. Is that the same as Spam? It was pretty gross. These days she's a foodie, so that's good.

Most pre-prepared and packaged foods are scary. I don't eat any of the ones you showed either. I would rather eat a peanut butter sandwich than nuke something from Tyson any day.

Pirata said…
Oh my, I feel I may be the only one to have tried almost all of these. I lived on a diet of Hot Pockets and Mountain Dew in college...and my heart started skipping. Lol. Green bean casserole isn't bad but it isn't what I'd call good. Tyson kind of cornered the market on convenient chicken items. Don't try Budget, for obvious reasons. Chunky soups smell terrible, stay away from them. Hormel? Enh. It's alright in a pinch. I haven't had Spam since I was very very little and it is an abomination. Tapioca is amazing. You won't be grossed out by it, I promise. I have never seen pickled watermelon rind here but I bet my boyfriend would love it. I cannot imagine anything quite as horrifying to me as head cheese would be. I guess we were a convenience food family there for a while. ;)
islaygirl said…
the only thing i've had is the gr. bean casserole -- my mom made it growing up and i would eat the french's onions off the top. my sister refuses to come to thanksgiving unless i make it, so once a year, out it comes. i have the half-empty can of onions in the back of my pantry to prove it.
Anonymous said…
I have always lived in the Midwest, that desert of culinary delights. So I have eaten all of these things -- even looked forward to the green bean casserole at Thanksgiving, although it is an abomination at any other time. Except the head cheese; I draw the line at that.

Re: Spam. Horrible right out of the can, but downright tasty when sliced and fried in butter for breakfast. Just sayin'...
Unknown said…
How about Scrapple? My sister used to love it and eat it all the time. Yuck!

Or beef tongue? My grandfather would eat tongue sandwiches. Ick. I objected to the the idea of French-kissing my meal, on principle.

The worst was the jars of pickled pigs' feet at the Farmer's Market my mother used to take us to when we were little. That thing has haunted me for years...
MsCellania said…
Two words:


A mainstay in Hawaii, and a new favorite of mine for breakfast. Do I make it? No. I can't find the right sauce.
Jennifer said…
Hot Pockets are ok.. not great but I have bought them and enjoyed them. But I prefer the McCain pizza pockets better. and the pillsbury ones.

Campbells chunky soup, while I don't think I'd like the flavour posted here, I do enjoy the steak and potato

That green bean caserole is my all time favourite!!!!!

I love pulled pork, and those look yummy, but I bet even yummier if made homemade :)

I don't know about spam, but I like canned meat.

Rice pudding is sweet, I thought tapioca pudding and rice pudding were two different things. No? Well I do know that I like rice pudding with raisins in it.

Just the thought of pickled watermelon rines makes me cringe, I do love fresh watermelon though! LoL
Anonymous said…
THANK YOU for pinpointing the Chunky Soup smell. That is completely true now that I think about it.

Rice Pudding/Tapioca - do try.

As for the headcheese - I'm going to steal something from a commenter on another blog that posted a similar pic awhile back. "Imagining the texture of that jell-o ham in my mouth makes me want to rip my knee-caps off." Ditto.
Badger said…
This post just makes me want to tackle you and force-feed you a Hot Pocket. But I am feeling a little hostile at the moment, so don't mind me.

(P.S. There is a festival here in Austin every year that celebrates all things Spam. Spamarama -- look it up, yo.)
Mrs. G. said…
I don't think you missed anything (she said as she tried not to urp at the sight of that head cheese)except the rice pudding-it really is good. But homemade.

I grew up in a watermelon rind eating family-freaks, all of us.
robiewankenobie said…
rice pudding and tapioca are entirely different things.

rice pudding is cool, because it isn't completely thick city like regular pudding. it has more hutzpah.

tapioca...have you ever had boba, or bubble, tea? tapiocas are the dealios in the bottom of the cup. so like little round balls...almost caviar in mouthfeel. and a wee bit chewy. hrm. this doesn't sound like an endorsement, although it is. grandpapawakenobie is a big big fan.
Anonymous said…
Very entertaining blog entry AND comments. I don't do rice pudding OR tapioca and I'll resist telling you what they remind me of, but no, thank you. Spam's okay, fried, as someone else said; head cheese, not on your life.
Anonymous said…
My brother eats hot pockets EVERY day for lunch. Could not live without them. The irony is at age 38 he has a 32 inch waist & perfect abs.
God has a wicked sense of humour ;)
Anonymous said…
My foster kids absolutely LOVED fried Spam (every Sunday morning with pancakes or french toast-ugh)I could never eat it after cooking it. Frankly, it smells like a mixture of dead pig and wet dog.
Also, if you have applesauce and Redi-Whip, do a 50/50 combination and - presto - mock tapioca! Hey, I had ALOT of foster kids and this is cheaper and easier than making real tapioca. You gotta use REAL whipped cream though, not that cruel whip crap.
You really should try real tapioca and rice pudding.
Next time you go to Chicago, go to the Drake and have the rice pudding there. Theirs is the best in the western hemisphere. Eight bucks and a bargan at twice the price!
Unknown said…
I've never eaten one of those items ever. I've decided you must be Kosher because nothing, but nothing on that list would ever pass Kashrut laws!
Anonymous said…
I tried rice pudding, once, against my will. It seems that people who love rice pudding are always trying to get the rest of us to eat it. Bleah. I feel very strongly that rice should not be sweet.
alice c said…
Tapioca is like frog's spawn. Don't do it to yourself - your body is a temple not a stagnant pond.
Anonymous said…
ooh I was going to endorse bubble tea that has large-lovely-chewy tapioca pearls in a sweet tea mixture that you suck up through a wide straw, but see that robiewankenobie beat me to it. Maybe it's the sound of the word tapioca that turns people off.

Haven't tried any of the other delicacies you mentioned and don't plan to.
alice said…
Oh - WHAT IS THIS actually? Please? It looks amazingly awful!
(Head cheese)
Sarah Louise said…
Try tapioca--what Robie and other commenters said. I have only ever had "cozy shack" pre-made at the grocery store, but it's good. (I think at age 27 I decided I needed to know what it was, having never tried it.) I haven't had it for years, but now I have a hankering.

My food claim to fame is I've never eaten a Twinkie. Or a Ho Ho.

You, bb, are a fun blogger. You keep us hungry to come back for more...

and my vw sort of looks like a strange yogurt brand: yqmirkl
alyson. said…
head cheese..... gross gross nasty and gross. but come on, green bean casserole is so tasty... but make it with organic ingredients and fresh beans. MUCH better

{love your humor, btw!}