25 things that shit me to tears*

1. Hand-made cloth menstrual pads.

2. Name dropping.

3. Gum snappers.

4. Fruit flavored bagels.

5. CNN.

6. Monthly inter-generational church service.

7. Pantyhose.

8. Energy drinks.

9. What ever food has become trendy enough to be hawked in the supermarket. This month it's paninis.

10. People who make a hobby of complaining about their spouses.

11. Not winning the lottery.

12. Pets.

13. My dish washing brush clotted with melted cheese.

14. Too tight shoes.

15. Little specks of dirt visible just beneath my keyboard.

16. Crooked pictures.

17. Stains.

18. Anything on The History Channel.

19. Smudges on my glasses.

20. Nose pickers.

21. The state of my garden.

22. Standardized testing.

23. The dog, down the block, barking at night, because they leave him outside for hours on end.

24. Airplane food.

25. PMS.



Comments

Saoirse said…
the dog! I let mine out at 5:00 a.m. this morning. She ALWAYS comes right back in. For some unknown reason, it is at THIS flippin' time in the morning, she chooses to ROAM and I can hear her, half a block away, barking her head off. Yikes! No neighbor of the month ribbon for me! she's back now looking like she's had a fun night/morning of debauchery.
Birchsprite said…
Not quite as relevant anymore... But I'm back now so Happy New Year!
Jess said…
Fruit flavored bagels?

(horror)
Eliane said…
Cleaning the bathroom first thing in the morning, while enjoying the flu. But we love standardized tests, somehow my kids crack those like nobody else!
Amy A. said…
I was wondering when someone was going to flip this one!
Heather said…
Oh, I love airplane food, because it means I'm going somehwere!

I hate scrambled egg on the end of the dish brush. gag.
Anonymous said…
Oh yeah, melted cheese stuck to a brush or a dishcloth. Ew.
RW said…
What happened to no. 3?
Jennifer said…
I'm so with you... however I do love blueberry bagels. :)

And what is "Name dropping"?
Anonymous said…
My mother regales me with horror stories of #1, in the uphill-both-ways manner of parents.

But pets and blueberry bagels are excellent. Except when the former is not. The latter is always excellent.
blackbird said…
Jennifer: people who seek to impress me with who they know or who they've met or who they work with are name droppers....and don't impress me.
Anonymous said…
I'm right with you there on #1. To date, I have not done anything so wrong that I deserve cloth menstrual pads.

Jen
tut-tut said…
A good list; but number 6 occurs weekly here. We're all in the same pew, so to say . . .
Joke said…
Until I read #1, I was DEAD CERTAIN you were making that up.

-J.
KPB said…
I see your hand-made cloth menstrual pads and raise you...

sea sponges.





And note to self, stop bitching about Chef for fear of shitting blackbird to tears.

And I'm so proud to have taught you such a phrase of eloquence.
Stephanie said…
I want to make both of these lists.

I'm with you on 1, not sure what 6 means, really dislike 10, too, have come to terms with 17 and, come on, aren't we all the occasional 20?
Wendy said…
We stay home for #6. Unless it's Christmas Eve or Easter.
TheOneTrueSue said…
HAND-MADE CLOTH MENSTRUAL PADS?

The humanity.
Anonymous said…
what airplane were you one where you could actually get food? do tell.
Ali said…
#19. kills me every day.