somehow it took four hours to make a pie

Middle and I decided to make an apple pie. Mostly because we have about 45 pounds of apples.



I put him in charge of the apples and I got the stuff together for the dough.
Half an apple into peeling, he pointed out that his tendonitis was bothering him and I took over.
He sliced.
We decided to make a version from Joy Of Cooking in which the apples get cooked in a pan with some butter and sugar - it's supposed to keep the pie from falling in on itself when you bake it and make the filling thicker. Of course we added the sugar first and weren't supposed to - but I think it worked out okay.



You COOK them first.

I was showing him how to cut butter into flour and sugar



for pate brise when I realized that we needed a 1/4 cup of Crisco.

I SAID WE COOKED THE APPLES FIRST.



Then we cooled them - as instructed.



Anyway, I told Middle that we needed Crisco and ordered him to crawl into the pantry and find the familiar blue can.
But when he retrieved it we couldn't tell how old it was - and there was only a code of numbers on the bottom of the can.



It had a greenish tinge, but, I don't know, I don't use Crisco more than once or twice a year...
There was a scent too. An odor, actually, but I still wasn't sure.
Go see if D's car is in the driveway across the street, I told him after I had incorporated the Crisco into the dough...
Why? he asked incredulously, you can't extract the possibly bad Crisco...
I know, but I thought I'd ask to smell hers, I said, laughing so hard that I was crying.
Oh. So. You're gonna walk across the street and ask if she has Crisco, and when she says yes, how much would you like, you're gonna say YOU JUST WANT TO SMELL IT?



And, yes, that was my plan.
But instead, I called the number on the can



and read them the code and they told me that the Crisco was just over four years old and that I should dispose of it immediately.

See? Bad Crisco is greenish and good Crisco is blindingly white.



We went and bought some ready made pie crust, because it also turned out that our dough would have to rest in the fridge for four to six hours before we could roll it out. And that wasn't in our plan.


And Middle



did some fancy work...



And it all came out right in the end.





Tasty too.

Of course the kitchen was left an absolute DISASTER.



Just wait till I tell you about the candy apples.