I yam what I yam

While walking with D the other day, she asked what the rest of the morning held in store for me. I told her:
shower
laundry in
dinner out of freezer
clean up Youngest and Middle's room

She was shocked that I seemed so organized and asked if I could give her any hints on how to get it together at her house. As I thought about what she could do to get it together, I realized that what she needed was me.
A housewife/mother.
It occurred to me that my career is just this. The house and the people in it. And I work at this job with the same fervor and zeal that I worked at my jobs out in the world. Even more so as I am emotionally tied to this work in a way that I wasn't always out there.
I do my job well. I do it with intensity and yet, without micromanagement of the children and their lives.
I do not get involved in clubs or committees at the schools, I do have social time with friends, I do not seek part-time employment for additional income, I do truly enjoy the work of it all -- getting the people I love prepared each morning and on their way...welcoming them back and feeding them, clothing them, having toasty beds ready. I hand-hold a lot, but try not to destroy them by spoiling them (though I am sure many people would say that picking up after them is spoiling them - they seem to have learned what is expected of them).
I am not embarrassed or ashamed of my job --
I know plenty of people who do my job but not completely. The homemaking is an afterthought in their lives - they are interested in other things and so laundry, cleaning, shopping and caring for the children become the things they do in between the other things they do or until it is time for them to do something else. Something more important.
I am lucky. I have the luxury to feel that this job is the most important job.
This was not always the case. We lived in a too small apartment for too long. We drove a crappy car for too long. We did not vacation. There were times when financial worry was very clear. There have been many years where this job of mine was at risk. There were times when I worked. And even now, after K has been in a staff position for only 18 months, we still wonder when the rug will be pulled out from under us. We have never learned to bask in security -- and I don't suppose that is a bad thing.
I don't think about when I will stop doing this job.
I like this job very much.

Besides, the benefit package is extraordinary.

Comments

Laura said…
Thank you for this post. Some days I really struggle with staying at home with the kids. I went from a really exciting and busy job that I loved and excelled at (police officer) to being a stay at home mom, then boom-boom, had two more kids. It was a very rough transition. Some days the monotony threatens my sanity..I feel like I pick up the same messes, over and over and over. And the laundry! It is hard to feel a sense of ~accomplishment~ on a day to day basis. But when I start to feel like that, I take a step back and remember that this is the most important job of my life-my family. So thanks for reminding me!
~L.
Anonymous said…
Love this post...wish more people did. I used to stop by occasionally. Now I visit every day.

Jan
Anonymous said…
Great post. I must have come back to read this 10 times, just to remind myself what I'm here for now.
Another Loretta