I am home.
I am pretty weary, but I am home.
Oh, people, I have so much to tell you about...(hazy dream music).

I flew out to Chicago and began Uber-ing with the first trip to my very 1970's hotel.


Atrium, check, water feature, check, bar, check, cafeteria for breakfast...okay, not all of it was cliché-pretty. But my room(s) were newly renovated and I had three sinks! (One in the bathroom, one in the kitchenette, one in the bedroom - I know not why.)
I dumped my things and went to lunch with my co-workers and then out to work setting up for the convention. Many, many Ubers. Blah blah blah, long day, back to the hotel to clean up and THEN dinner at 9:00 with the core team who makes it all work right at The Girl & the Goat.


So, on the one hand: 9:00pm? I am dead. And, on the other hand: I've never had a meal like that in my life. Amazing. Lots of cocktails, rich, wonderful food, laughing and wine. Perhaps not the best meal to have late at night the night before a big show but there you are. We survived.

That same night - just before the dinner, was Youngest's senior show. Not only did he do the design for the show but his work was chosen from among his many peers to be displayed. Youngest put me on FaceTime so I could walk through the show and meet his friends and professors and see his truly astounding work.


That would be his cloth and leather-bound Bibles coded into barcode. Every. Word. Barcodes. He did a thesis on artificial intelligence that I cannot explain because I don't understand it. Seriously. It was beautiful to behold.

Back at work we did our show, it went well, it was the kind of working/bonding/great experience that builds our team. We had meals out, we slumped over our breakfasts in the hotel. We had lots of drinks, we interacted with the public for very long days and then we packed it all up. We were, to be sure, pretty giddy and exhausted by the time we packed it all up but I work with amazing people and I couldn't be luckier.


And then I took a cab from one end of town to the other and walked into Poppy's apartment where four friends and some very tall gin and tonics awaited me.


So, THEN, we all stayed up late laughing and talking and spent our days laughing and talking and shopping and laughing and drinking and laughing...and I was fairly exhausted by the end of that part of my trip as well.


But a good exhausted.

But I had to fly home for Youngest's graduation...


which was in another huge convention center and which was long and emotional and I cried and cried while he was proud and exhausted.

So, I'm sitting and thinking about my whirlwind trip...


walks near Poppy's along the lake,


wonderful dinners and drinks at half a dozen places, my sweet boy and all he's accomplished - (the 17th was his birthday too),


and I am grateful for everything. Every bit of it.

K got an email address at work (freelancers out there know what this means) and Middle's girl comes home from Italy today. Oldest has his ups and downs but is dealing with some shit (as we say) and doing okay.

And my brother visits this week and K and I are going to a surprise party today and I have mountains of laundry to do and a couple of big work events in the next week and things are very, very busy.

I was standing in the station with Youngest the other day and told him about something I was considering:

me: so, I was thinking, while I was away, that maybe I should just out us.

him: ...what?

me: I was thinking, what the hell, just show our faces, tell our names, just be done with this.

him: you're kidding, right? No one gives a crap who we are or what we look like and this is your thing. You can't just stop with your whole thing. Stupid idea, Mom.

So, there you are.
And here I am.


Susie Sunshine said…
Youngest is right.

Keeping yourself behind veil means everyone has the opportunity to "see" you everywhere.
There are many fabulous, tiny women wearing all-black (with the occasional pop of beige)in the world. Could that one be bird?!

It's a happy thought, possibly crossing paths.
You are the internets Tooth Fairy!

Susie Sunshine
expert on blogs, booze, boys, and bitchery since 2003
susan savory said…
I, too, agree with Youngest (mostly.)

Because you and I work in the same industry I sort of sussed you out a long time ago...not because I was trying - just because. I remember so clearly meeting you by chance on the floor of one of those gigantic trade shows a few years ago - learning your name (your beautiful little blackbird business card still winks at me from the bulletin board above my desk) and feeling like I'd cracked some secret code. You offered in that moment to tell me things - "Is there anything you want to know?" - and my immediate reaction was "NO!" - I realized that I want Oldest, Middle and Youngest to remain that. I want to wonder and speculate about what comes after the K in K. I want to hang onto the possibility that your Tuvalu might be in the middle of the ocean half-way across the world or right here in my own backyard. You - as blackbird - have been a lovely part of my life, on a daily basis, for years and years.

Here is the one small place that I part ways with Youngest - people do actually "give a crap." Most of us just also love a good mystery. And your kind of mystery, dear BB, is very very good.

xoxo - Susan
Helen said…
I see you in Poppy's mirror. That's enough. Thankyou. Keep some for yourselves I say.
Even though I know your real name I only use it once a year -- when I'm addressing holiday cards. Otherwise, I always think of you as Bb and that's how I address you in emails.

What you choose to do about sharing identities (or not) is your business. Regardless, you are and always will be Blackbird of Tuvalu.
Jeanne P said…
What a whirlwind of emotion! Your life is certainly full these days.
Congratulations to Youngest! He is such a talent and so wise for a young man.

I often think about your Oldest. I know his struggles are somewhat similar to my oldest. Thankfully mine seems
to be finally finding his comfortable place in the world at age 31.

I hope when all the excitement is over you can just breathe and have a relaxing summer. I'm hoping to get my Mom to the Cape sometime in June. It's one of her Happy Places.
grumpy said…
Youngest is wise beyond his years. Please don't be done with this, I always look forward to your posts and your little snapshots of a life, so different sometimes, so familiar sometimes. I really appreciate the time you take to talk to us here. long time reader from Melbourne Australia xx
Duyvken said…
Beautiful blackbird - you are out already. Names and faces are superficial things. Youngest is right.
I adore his project, I am in awe actually.
And K getting an email address. That's HUGE.
Poppy B. said…
Shh, bird. Let this just be our secret.
Paola said…
Um. No.
This is your THING.
And we LOVE it.
Congrats to amazing Youngest.
Happy and beyond for K's work email.
tut-tut said…
Whirlwind; good for you all
Anonymous said…
I love your THING.
And this whole post. Sounds like the entire experience was magnificent. That building! That bar code project! Your amazing life and talented menfolk.
In many ways you are like a storybook character to me, The Adventures of Blackbird.