notes from the office

I starting to feel more "settled in" at my job, and it's nice.
The weather is better too and that helps. It's not as dark when I leave in the morning and it's getting lighter in the evenings which is nice. I've even walked a couple of times from the train to home.
The only thing I still haven't found a routine for is lunch.
When I first got to my job I didn't stop for lunches very much. I think I thought stopping and eating would throw off my progress. Tough to explain. But now I'm finding time to eat and exploring the options for lunch and bringing stuff from home (when I'm in the mood to figure that out at six in the morning). So I'm doing better with that too.

I've been saying that the first month of my job I learned The Job and the second month of my job I learned the people. It seems like the third month of my job I've learned my self.
And, here I am, in the fourth month of my job - settling in.
I used to mess SOMETHING up every day. Now, I mess a couple of things up a couple of times a week. This week I made arrangements for my boss to be in two different cities on the same day.
Priceless. He's awfully good about my messing up, but I kickkickkick myself for a long time after that kind of thing.
I wonder if it's because I'm not 25 or because I have a lot on my mind or if it's because I haven't worked in a long time that I make mistakes. I might just be stupid. Imagine.
I listen to other people in my office speak confidently about projects they are involved in and wonder if I will sound like that too sometime. I long for it. But I also wonder why Doritos are triangles so don't ponder my situation too much.

I was awfully busy yesterday - from morning till evening, which I like much better than being bored. I try to walk around a few times during the day - take mail to the mailroom rather than have it picked up, walk to someones office instead of calling them, go outside for a few minutes instead of ordering lunch in and, at one point, I was walking to the mailroom and I smelled a familiar scent from life at home.
Someone, down the hall from where I sit, was burning a lavender candle.
I smelled it as I was on my way and it stopped me dead in my tracks.
It was so out of place, that scent which only comes from a candle.
It was so reminiscent of life at home that I did not recognize it right away.
But, then, it hit me. I walked into her office and said: is that...?
and she said: oh! I had a lavender candle burning. I hope it didn't bother you!
I could not possibly explain how much it did not bother me.
And, so, I said: no bother at all. It's lovely, in fact, and left quickly.

I'm trying so hard to say less as it seems, at work, to mean so much more.