things I'm working on

I'll be starting my job on the 29th. Or the 25th or 26th. It's not settled yet.
I'm trying not to think too much about what a huge transition it's going to be - I'm looking at the clock at 7pm and trying to imagine what it might be like to come home at that time.
Last night I asked Middle if he would have been able to marinate the pork if I called him when I got on the train.
Tomorrow I'm putting the summer clothes in the attic and assessing my wardrobe.
I've ordered new shoes for a couple of the kids and some things for me and still need some kind of laptop tote bag - I have my eye on one, I just need to give myself permission to order it.
I've been experimenting with different shoes - my ballet flats are pretty but by 5 or 6pm they kill my legs - will I be sitting more at an office? I have no idea.
I'm over thinking everything.
I don't think I can have a cup of coffee and then get on the train for 36 minutes.
I hardly ever eat lunch, but I don't mind having a small bag of chips at 4:00.
I think I can drive the boys to school and then hop on the back of the scooter and take the 8:09 with K.
It hadn't occurred to me that I might be on the same train as my husband.
I have no clue how I will get home from the station - K tends to work until at least 7. I'm hoping I can leave my office before then.
Maybe he'll still be freelance and can pick me up at the station.
Or, I could walk - it's just under a mile.
My mom can bring Youngest to see the pulmonary specialist in November. I've worked that out.
She can also drive the boys home from school if the weather is bad - but not too bad, I don't want my mom driving around in the snow.
If I put a load of laundry in the washing machine when I wake up and move it to the dryer when I get home I can probably stay on top of that, right?

You don't think I'm over thinking much, do you?

Comments

Sinda said…
I do NOT think you're over-thinking much. Or, well, if you are, then I do too.

I've gradually moved to only wearing Dansko shoes to work. I can walk in them, stand in them, climb stairs up or down, and my feet are always fine.

You might be hungry at different times sine your whole schedule (and energy output) will change. Pack a lunch? I keep nuts, chocolate and tea bags in my desk. And COOKIES.

I try to do the laundry on the weekends, but if needed, I've found I can put it in the wash first thing and move it to the dryer right before I leave, and fold at night.

I think those boys might need to take on some dinner responsibilities?
JustACliche said…
unfortunately I don't think you're over-thinking this. It's a HUGE adjustment. You can definitely do it, it's just not the easiest thing. The hardest thing I find is finding time to grocery shop. I want to see the kids after school - not shop. And I hate having to do it on the weekends when we're all together. Therefore, the cupboards are currently bare.
Ali said…
You can do it. But be kind to yourself while you adjust.
jo said…
Having gone back to a full time schedule I can tell you that you can keep up with the laundry if you do exactly as you said.
I also bought myself a zojirushi bento box and I tossing some various things to have for mid morning and lunch. Just because i work at a cooking school doesn't mean we ever have time, or kitchen space, to cook for ourselves. I cannot eat before I get out the door in the morning, it is just too early to think about food yet.
Shoes are not an issue at the moment since I am still in Berks, but soon I will require sock and given my plantar faciitus issue,coupled with how much time I spend on my feet and shoes are a HUGE consideration. Wardrobe? Not so much. Catalogs are piling up next to me, but I can't commit.
As for middle, the entire reason I cook now is because both my parents worked until late and I was responsible for starting dinner. Consider it early training for his college years, he will thank you for it later.
You will be brilliant and we all know it!
OMG. You and I have totally just changed places. Welcome to what my world was just a few months ago.

You won't stay on top of the washing. Just accept it and move on.
hmmm, that didn't sound overly supportive, positive or encouraging did it...

Sorry about that.
alice c said…
When you work out how to keep on top of the laundry please do a tutorial.

Thanks.
Suse said…
YOU don't need to keep on top of the laundry, the whole FAMILY does. Same goes for the vacuuming, cooking and cleaning of bathrooms.

Somehow the cleaning of the toilet will always remain the mother's task. Sigh ...
Stephanie said…
I think this transition requires lots of thinking...but some of it will just work itself out in the first few weeks.

I keep thinking of Middle and hoping he is better.
jenontheedge said…
Thinking things through carefully is a natural response to such a major life change.

Do we get to see a photo of the new laptop bag?
RW said…
I don't think you are overthinking either, it is a huge change to your lives. Good luck with the laundry. My son has asked to help out more with the kitchen prep - that is a huge support to the family.
Fannie Mae said…
Planning for a big transition is NOT the same as over thinking. And the laundry? Oh, for Pete's sake, I have a secret system. I'll e-mail you.
Wendy said…
When I found out that Glenn's gym clothes needed to be washed over the weekend and I do laundry on Monday, I assigned the task to him. He now does one load of his own laundry on Friday. The boys could easily take on one load each to help you out.
Kelly said…
I think that perhaps Youngest or even Middle should be charged with taking the clothes out of the washing machine and moving them to the dryer when they get home from school. They will be dry by the time you get home. It is not a hard or time consuming chore, and if they do it every day, it will eventually become a habit.
Of course, if you really want to help them with growing up and taking responsiblity, you could always insist that they remove the clothes from the dryer, hang up, fold, and put away the clothes. Then clean up the kitchen, start dinner, and run you a nice hot bath. Then you can come home and have a nice glass of wine and put your feet up.
KathyR said…
There is no such thing as over-thinking.

Except when there is.

This isn't one of those times. G'head.
Anonymous said…
What Suse and Kelly said. And yes, walk home from the station. It'll clear your mind and give you a few minutes of just you time as a transition between one world and the other.

I am so excited for you.

jbhat
Anne said…
Congratulations! I don't think you should worry about the housework (YET)...but you should consider outsourcing to the kids. I do think you should worry about drinking coffee before you get on the train and the to and from stuff and the morning schedule and your clothes and your long days. Good luck. I've been on a major hiatus (remember me? HAPPY TO BE HERE .. i am MUCH happier and as my sisters say...better than a soap opera..some time i'll blog it and make everybody feel lucky they are not me). GOOD LUCK ON YOUR JOB ... Hope it is fun for you. This is probably a good time in your life to go back to work..good thing it was now and not last year. Cheers! Anne
MsCellania said…
Aw, of course you are over-thinking your life; you are facing big changes, and it's all kind of an unknown.
About the laundry; in a few months, get a washer/dryer that does double loads each time. That one thing has changed my life considerably. In the meantime, have the boys do their own laundry. In fact, their helping with the entire house would be a great thing for them -- the cooking, cleaning, laundry - these are things they need to know how to do, anyway. Because, you know; their wifes/partners will work and will expect them to help, too.
(See! More benefits to your returning to the workplace!)
Sarah O. said…
Because everyone loves unsolicited advice:

1. Delegate, delegate, delegate.

2. Do whatever it takes to stop overthinking at bedtime.

3. Be really, really kind to yourself. It's a cliche but it's one of the true ones.
Anonymous said…
It's so obvious that you are over thinking. You've been home the past 20 years and cared for all your boys. Now, it's time for all of them to step in and help out. And I am sure they'll all be happy to. And I agree with MsCellania, boys need to learn becasue ina few years they'll have to do it anyway.
It'll all be fine
paola
Amy A. said…
I agree with the Dansko shoe comment. They are great for work and walking and look cute with tights.

Also, I'm thinking that maybe if you get college student you could afford a little house fairy, he/she could keep the laundry going, dust, vacuum, etc. Maybe less expensive than you think.
Tutta la Storia said…
You have a big transition coming and it looks like your mind is wheeling. It will all work out in the end. A cliche saying, I guess, but true none the less.
kmkat said…
I think that laundry tasks and dinner assemblage should be assigned to Middle and Youngest. The tasks of dinner planning and the purchasing of provisions can still be retained by the experts, i.e., you and K. Think of it this way: their future girlfriends and wives will thank you.
catsteevens said…
I'm with Sinda...if you're over-thinking then I am too. Because it feels like you just crawled into my head :)

It is a huge relief to see so many people have issues with laundry.

As I am fairly new to the juggling of child/home/work, I cannot offer any advice. Just lotsa luck!
Just Plain Jane said…
This may get lost in the many comments, but I just read a book review and thought of you. It's about seven women who returned to the work force.
Hopefully this will get you there:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/21/books/review/Allen-t.html?8bu&emc=bua2
(Once a bookseller, always a bookseller, I'm afraid)
Eleanor said…
The thinking is good because by posting about it you now have a list.

I love lists.

Lists can be printed out and handed out at a family meeting. The family then draws up a preliminary schedule for household tasks, one of the kids will then type it up in a table - days of week, names, tasks. The table is printed and stuck on the fridge.

If you can all make fire this will be a breeze.

P.S. Nothing will get done the way you think it should, but you will have to bite your tongue.

P.P.S. This is in no way a solution, but it is a very helpful process.

P.P.P.S. I'm very happy and excited for you bb!
Loretta said…
Having returned to work a few years ago after 9 years at home, here's the deal:

-The first few months, you will be EXHAUSTED
-This too will pass
-You will be very organized in the beginning, with lunches, dishes, laundry, and then about week 3 or 4, everything will fall apart
-This too will pass
You will feel tremendous guilt and angst the first time someone is home sick or has the day off and you can't be home with them
-This will not pass as quickly.
In about 6 months, you'll wonder what all the fuss was about and you'll be drinking coffee on the train, know the best and quickest lunch places, begin to relax and enjoy your job and your commute, and your boys will become adept at roasting a chicken, putting the water on for pasta, and understanding the difference between turn the oven on and turn the broiler on.

YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!
Anonymous said…
I would love thirty six minutes a day with my husband. Just holding hands and being quiet together.

Morning meditation for two, please.

ErinH
Miz S said…
I'm excited-slash-nervous for you. I think it will be a big adjustment, but totally worth it in the long run. As much as I grouse about work sometimes, and as much as I claim that I wish I could stay home, I love my job and I love being part of my work community. You will make new friends, you will be loved by them, you will have lots to do and think about. (Not that you don't already have lots to do and think about. You know what I mean.)

Anyway, I can't wait to hear your work stories.

Everyone's rooting for you, honey.
Rae said…
It's good to overthink things. I'll be glad for you when you are actually in the change, rather than waiting for it. Be good to yourself. And take it from me, the mother is one of the most adjustable creatures on the planet. You will adjust and I think I can say that you will do it beautifully.
Poppy Buxom said…
Yes, you're overthinking. But hey, it's cool. That's what you do.

I'm with the bloggers who are telling you that the boys can step up to the plate. Not to go all Obama fangirl on you, but I've met them, and YES, THEY CAN.

Our job as moms is to birth them, then get them off the boob, out of diapers, out of the carpool, and out of the house. During this process I don't think it's too much to ask that they learn how to launder clothes and cook food. After all, their former housekeeper is off earning their college tuition.

I think it's a good idea to come up with menus and dinner plans for a couple of weeks, because if you're anything like me, the strain of learning a new job will wipe you out. Just trying to remember everyone's names and titles is hard enough, let alone factoring a commute and new domestic routine. I don't think I ever had a new job that didn't find me passing out cold at 7:30 p.m. on the first Friday night.

I can't wait to hear about it all! You'll be great and so will the boys.
MizMell said…
The transition gets a bit hairy. I leave the house at 7am and return home by 8 pm. I have found laundry is a weekend thing and I have to need something pretty damn bad to stop by the market after work.
Also, a glass of wine is better on Friday or Saturday evening--alcohol and tired don't mix.
The trade off is the bills get paid and I occasionally have "green money" in my purse.
You are doing what I would do if I were to go back to work. I over think how I'd over think--swear to God.

I hope it all works out smooth and fine for you.