finally, something I can sink my teeth into

We watched Synchronized Swimming last night followed by Dressage.
Try as I might, I cannot watch Synchronized Swimming without getting a little giggly.

start

I understand that there is a great deal of athleticism in this sport.

double

I can imagine that it must take great strength and years of practice to reach this level of competition.

nose clips

I realize that these women have incredible talent and dedication, but I find it difficult to remain serious whilst watching them perform.

deep breath

It may have something to do with the nose clips.

drama

Or the drama.

expressive

I love the way the athletes prance out to the side of the pool and pose themselves.
I love that their hair is held in place with gelatin.
I admire the staying power of the purple and black eyeshadow.

legs in a box

This aquatic coffee table cannot be easy to achieve.

box

I am definitely going to try it with Middle or Youngest the next time we are in a pool.

monster hands

The swimmers must do "egg beaters" with their legs to maintain this pose. I call those hands "monster hands." Monster hands I could do.

<span class=

It was a spectacular thing to watch, in more ways than one.

the wave

Regarding Dressage: one wears a terrifically fitted suit and wee top hat and sits upon a dancing horse whilst dramatic music plays.
(When Middle heard us discussing it, during the previous competition, he thought they were going to bring the horses into the pool, which would have been good, but I think the hats might have floated off.)
It's all about intricate footwork (or, should I say hoofwork)and timing and especially exciting when a horse decides to mess with the rider for a minute.
Fascinating to watch - for about 30 minutes, after that it all becomes a blur of riding jackets and sweaty horses.
They tell me the horse is cued to each step by the rider through small nudges and gentle kicks.
I'm not sure which seems more difficult - teaching a horse to dance or wearing those nose clips.
Perhaps I was meant to be be a Rhythmic Gymnast.
I think I could tumble with a rubber ball or ribbon...maybe.


Please note that these photos have been lifted from the NBC website where they were uncredited.

Comments

I could certainly tumble with a rubber ball or ribbon. I am able to tumble using nothing more than my own two feet on a daily basis. Adding props seems to make it easier, so much more to trip over.
Tuli said…
This post was better than watching it on TV!
jenontheedge said…
Have you seen the old Martin Short skit about synchro swimming on "Saturday Night Live"? Classic.
eurolush said…
Those ladies have gotten me all hot and bothered.

I think it's the pool straddling...


Or is it the moster hands??
ingrid said…
i laughed my ass off reading this. and it's not a petite ass. ;)
Badger said…
SPARKLE MOTION!
Anonymous said…
They look like very wet drag queens to me. Very funny post, bb.


jbhat
I think they're better watched from a distance when I can't see their nose clips. Not many Olympic events allow the use of jazz hands;) Basically this and figure skating.
Karla May said…
I'm not sure why, but synchronized swimming has always CREEPED me out. I seriously can't watch it. But these photos? Hilarious.

And I'd never seen dressage before this year's Olympics, and it has got to be one of the oddest/most-intriguing things ever. The horses look absolutely mechanical. Bizarrely mesmerizing.
I've interviewed synchronised swimmers before. They were remarkably normal and suitably bristly at the whole world's mirth about their 'sport'.

I hear there is BMX biking these Olympics. It's kinda killed the whole thing for me.

What next? Skateboarding?
MsCellania said…
My sister has done dressage since she was 11. If she gets you in a scissors hold, she could literally break your back. Her horse loves her; he whinnies and squeals when he hears her car drive up, and snaps her breeches waistband very delicately with his teeth when she turns away from him while she is grooming him. And when he gets tired of 'small nudges and gentle kicks', he occasionally flings her off. And turns around with a "Well, look at you on your butt on the ground there!" look.
I'm laughing about your future pool plans with your sons - Will you all be wearing the makeup and ferocious grins, too?!
Scot said…
Do you think the horses give a damn? Do you think they care that they've been all gussied up, flown half way around the world, are being fed Chineese hay and are in THE OLYMPICS?

Also, no offense, Kim, but the BMX is the most exciting 36 seconds of the games so far. These kids peddle their asses off and the track is crazy cool! I was literally yelling at the TV.
It's the summer version of snowboarding.
Did you ever see the Robin Williams bit about the olympic snowboarders? Like them, these kids don't want the Wheaties box cover - they want the Count Chocula box!
Scot said…
By the way, you're right about the Synchronized Swimming. It's kinda like watching Celtic Thunder!
Well rehearsed but still cheesy.
I recommend that you and youngest embark on a program of stretches now in preparation for an attempt next summer. Some of those poses could cause serious cramps.

PS Do you have witchy toes? They seem to be a pre-requisite.
Anonymous said…
In love synchro swim, along with swim and dive (it that what you call them???) they're my favourites.
That is when figure skating is not there, then THAT is my favourite.
paola
The nose clips dement me.

As do the sequins.
Suse said…
The bloke I jobshare with told me last week that he has a friend (female, middle aged, large) who, when she has a few drinks in her, and only in the right company at dinner parties, does a hilarious synchronised swimming routine behind the couch. First her head appears, with a clothespeg on her nose and a fixed grin on her face, then she disappears and her legs emerge from behind the couch doing the scissor-egg-beater thing, etc.

I was in tears just listening to his description. Would love to see the real thing.

ps. re Middle thinking the horses were going in the pool, Son #2 had only ever seen polo on horseback, so when he heard about water polo he assumed the horses would go in the pool too and was rather worried.
alice c said…
Scary, scary eyes. They could give you bad dreams for the rest of your life.

And the Water Polo...the last time this was discussed somebody wrote about their fear that their hores would drown...it is a worrying prospect. I think that we should always be kind to hores.
Elisa said…
I used to love watching syncronized swimming as a child. But even then, I coulnd't help but point out that the nose clips, weird sticky hair and mouth open to take big gulps of air in between kind of took some of the "graceful" out of the performance ;-)
BabelBabe said…
i would pay someone serious cash to see you and Youngest/Middle do this in the pool. Serious cash, I tell ya.
Anonymous said…
Last night my husband was watching the speed-walkers. It was simply just too much for me. I laughed, I cried, and then I literally wanted to hurl.

jbhat
smalltownmom said…
30+ years ago in high school we called synchronized swimming "Water Ballet." I took it as a freshman and OMG, it was damn hard and exhausting!
Crystal-Clear said…
wow fuckin prick dont even know the sport and never done it before.... its one of the hardest sports i would LOVE to see you try it! Anyways pretty sad for you to post this for wat ........





um ok den... so not worthit!
Anonymous said…
ok seriously?? Not tyring to offend anybody, or make anybody angry, but synchronized swimming is deffinately not as easy as you all think. We are constantly being made fun of, and they are threatening to take our sport out of the olympics. Yes, thats right, Synchronized swimming being taken out before ping pong. And you all say its not a sport, youve never tried it, youve never held your breath for 5 minutes during a routine. Before you go judging any of this, please have respect because you have no idea how hard we work everyday. My team works 6-8 hours everyday and most of us are homeschooled, so if you want to make fun of us, go right on ahead, its nothing we havent heard before, just please stop saying its not a sport. thanks
blackbird said…
Never said it wasn't a sport - never said it was easy:

*I understand that there is a great deal of athleticism in this sport.
I can imagine that it must take great strength and years of practice to reach this level of competition.*

How's about the Synch Swimmers out there READ what I wrote and admit that your nose clips are funny looking?

sheesh.
Anonymous said…
Fuck you. Like, actually fuck you. This post is so rude and disrespectful. How dare you go to an athlete who has given their life to a sport so challenging that your fat ass would fall off if you even put a toe in the water with us, and ridicule the equipment they use to swim, or the faces they make when near utter exhaustion and still trying to maintain some sort of illusion of pleasantry so that asshole spectators like you can continue to think that this is easy and effortless. Your ignorance is disgusting... educate yourself.
Jennifer M said…
Sorry for inviting myself into the debate.

"...your fat ass would fall off if you even put a toe in the water with us...", "fuck you..."
Common Anonymous!You are curiously not fair-play for someone who's supposed to practice sports. You are the one showing the most disrespect over here. Cool down dear!