sign language

I've been taking Youngest to the pulmonary specialist once a month for a while now.
I like her even though it's terribly depressing when I am wearing many muted layers and clogs and she breezes around in gorgeous suits and twinkly diamonds.
It takes at least three hours.
15 to 20 minutes to drive there (and she only has hours from 8 in the morning until 3 in the afternoon), 30 minutes in the waiting area (and she shares space with other pediatric specialists including genetics and immunology which can make for some sad sights), 30 minutes to do pulmonary testing and analyze the results, 15 minutes with the Fellow assigned to your case that day, 15 minutes with the actual pulmonary specialist in her finery, 15 minutes follow up with the Fellow to go over your 'plan of action,' 10 minutes to pay the fee and book your next appointment. Add another 15 - 30 minutes if there are any debates over the 'plan of action' or if the first round of testing doesn't look good and a nebulizer treatment and second test is required and then 20 minutes to drive home.
What this adds up to is A VERY BORED 12 year old.
Last week we spent a good half an hour defacing the paper cover of a magazine -

defaced

We took turns.
Youngest told me that the lines emanating from the armpits of the model on the right are 'stink.'

When he was younger it was easier to keep him occupied - now he just gets annoyed with me. If I'm lucky he'll listen to his Shuffle while I talk to the doctor. But last week everything seemed to take so long.

BORED

It was like trying to keep a toddler entertained.

bored at the doctor

And I was definitely aggravating him with the camera.

Of course it turned out that he needed a treatment.

bargaining

He bargained.

I bribed.

He agreed.

After the treatment he was twitchy, which happens, but which made it even harder to keep him entertained and happy. I spoke to him about what I wanted to have happen, how I wanted the doctor to agree to take him off one kind of inhaler and give him a different one.
Illustrated thusly:

The inhaler you use now, I tell him, has TWO medications in it...

two medications

combined...

combined

Take ONE of them AWAY -

and then we remove ONE

(he lowers my index finger)

middle finger

and you have the inhaler I want you to use.

It bought me another ten minutes.

Comments

Paula said…
It was always so much easier when you could sit them in your lap and whisper in their ears.
Eliane said…
That drawing is absolutely fabulous! (And I don't say such a thing quickly)
Badger said…
Dude. Yesterday the girl child had her black belt test for taekwondo, which takes three hours, not including getting there and back. The boy was not testing, but had to come along. There were like 300 people testing and we couldn't even see the wee tiny girl child from where we were sitting.

I FEEL YOUR PAIN.

And Youngest's.
Paola said…
I know the whole procedure must be nagging and annoying but bb...you are my hero.
elena jane said…
ugh, long pulm visit. ours used to be like 45 minutes. and that with the drive and entertaining the toddler. but we did no testing. then pulm doc moved to pittsburgh! so now we need to go to a new one, much further away and i haven't made the appt. bad mama!
but i so feel your pain, going to the allergist was like your pulm appt, including the entertaing the almost teen!
hope boychild is better with new meds! :)
tongue in cheek said…
Thi made me laugh out loud! Clever you! your son is one lucky boy to have such a cool mom!!
Heather said…
Youngest has a great smile. It goes all the way to his eyes.