home decor

Somehow, Middle has become enamoured of the Brocade Home catalogue.
I'm not sure where he saw it - and I do believe he has seen episodes of Bam's Unholy Union on MTV and that Mr. Bam's home is very, uh, baroque...but ANYWAY.
Middle decorated his room himself a few years ago.
It is navy and white and has light wood furniture (except I don't think it's wood as it's from Ikea and, as such, is probably leeching chemicals into the very air he breathes) and very much his personal taste.
But, since then, he's gone slightly goth.
And I say slightly because he doesn't wear black nail polish or draw black tears dripping from his eyes or anything - and he doesn't have a bleak attitude or spout existentialism at dinner.
But he does have this hair (guy on the far right).
And he does wear black jeans.
Okay, perhaps I am categorizing too much.
The POINT IS he has fallen in love with the decor that matches his look.



The brocade, the heavy woods, the chandeliers.



He adores this bed. WITH the purple velvet duvet.

And he wants this lamp...



I'm hoping this is a phase and he will pull out of it.
Either that, or he needs to find a full time job as this crappe is expensive.
Even when I do a google search on baroque Louisiana Whorehouse decor I find nothing comparable.
A search for purple velvet duvets lead me to this awful place -



Middle shrieked: Purple camo?! For hunting Barney! In a vineyard!

I dug up some articles on the Brocade Home design ethic and found out that he needs some major props as well...antlers, dark draperies, paintings, and taxidermy.
I've decided on these:



Actual taxidermy mice. Dressed.

No.
Wait.
This one -



Hamlet.
With an real mouse skull in his, uh, hand.

These proposals had Middle flee my company.
Our decorating plans are on hold for the moment.