I'm full of answers

Here I thought you'd want to know my shoe size (37) or what I weigh (I honestly don't know - 120 something?) and, it turns out that some people have tough questions.
But that's okay - I often say: I'm an open book.

Schmutzie asked what I think of the comeback of fingerless gloves.
And to this I say:
Who says they were ever 'out'...I have worn them, off and on, forever! I like them a lot but have also found that I like owning them more than wearing them - it's difficult to find appropriate weather for them - however they are quite fetching when worn indoors at the coffee shoppe whilst pretending to be a writer who lives in a garret somewhere.

A lady who is not ready to identify herself asked/confessed/wondered about my feelings when K lost his job. That's the first time I've written that. We been euphamising all over the place as his company did - his position was eliminated...
She wondered, while she is feeling overwhelmed with being a single parent, if I considered going back to work. And she's envious of my not working (which sounds harsher than either she or I mean it to...which, I think, she and I totally get).
Well, Anonymous - and don't you so appreciate the internet wherein you can be just that (which I am fine with) I think my initial thought process, when I was able to think, went like this: ohmyfuckinggodmaybeIshouldgetajobsomewherewithbenefitsrightaway.
Then, after K said he didn't think were in a position where I had to do that, I let it go.
Over the past month, all kinds of ideas have sprung to both our minds. This was a terrible shock to us, though not at all shocking. We are both anxious about what will happen next but K has some projects scattered about in the future. The thing is - for me to make any real contribution to our situation would involve 12 hour days (with commuting). When K is shooting or editing he is out of the house at least that long each day. Who raises our kids under those circumstances? How much could I possibly bring home? Who goes to school when Youngest is having an asthma attack? All this and much more continues to sit in the back of my head.
At this time there is not a reason for me to go to work...and everyone in the entire world should be incredibly envious - as I am unspeakably fortunate. And if you aren't sure that I know that, and have known that for...well...forever, then you don't know me. And that is why while K works incredibly hard to do impeccable work out there in the world, I work as tirelessly as possible to keep our house and raise our children.

Badger wants to know when I am going to Austin, for shopping and drinking, which SUITS ME FINE.
Okay, well, Austin may be out for a while, but I am going to blogher, couldn't we meet and drink there?

Mary questions my ennui regarding The English Patient and would like to know if I have an imaginary boyfriend...I haven't thought of this kind of thing for a while - and for no particular reason. Do you mean, like, George Clooney, Mary?
Because he would do nicely. I used to have a crush on Sting, but I grew out of it.
With regard to The English Patient, I can only say that I happened upon it one night at about ten o'clock. Foolishly thinking I might be able to stay up to see it (as I had heard good things) I found myself in and out of consciousness for the next three hours unable to tear myself away, yet never completely engaged. Ralph (which sounds very different here in Tuvalu) may be handsome, even crispy, but I just couldn't endure two hours of him so incapictated. PLUS, there is no pay off. I need pay off.

Emily (hi, Emily!) has three questions. Pushy? NO!
1. what is my favorite musical group or performer. any genre.
2. favorite movie
3. least favorite fashion trend (current or past)

Easy! Last first - LOW RISE PANTS - although I am rather short waisted, I think low rise pants are THE WORST.
Favorite movie? I have too many, and if you read me you know them...
You've Got Mail, Love Actually, Pride And Prejudice...girly movies.
Favorite musical group or performer is tough. I'm not very musical although everyone around me is...Dave Matthews? ack. Tom Jones. Damn. I'm all over the place. I will tell you this: there is almost NO ONE I'd go see in concert. That, and, that freaky Joanna Newsom may be growing on me.

Clare, honey, I forgive you. Lurk all you like...it's FINE.

My my, Annagrace wants to know what I would do if I was invisible for a whole day and what kind of holiday I would invent and how I'd like to celebrate it.
So, the holiday question first - I have, of late, realized that I am not a holiday person. I don't particularly care for any of them. Maybe Christmas. But just the other day I saw valentines in the shop and wimpered at the sight. I cannot STAND Easter, nor any political/patriotic holidays and my dad died on Halloween. Mother's day is a sham and there is nothing I could do on father's day that would ever BE ENOUGH. So I would rather not invent a holiday -
I would outlaw school. Children should be on holiday. Forever.
As for being invisible, I think I'd go to school with Middle to see what was up with him.
He's silent, that one, and I'd like to see his world.

Marian said: this is for anonymous up there. i would wager that there are many of us who occasionally feel just a bit jealous of bb's life, so full of cool stuff and cool kids and a husband who actually seems to make the kind of living that allows for a bit of relaxed -- shall we say -- enjoyment of the finer things in life. but her's is not a life without heartache -- she is rich in positive attitude, above all! and i love basking in it.
Thanks Marian -
and, do keep in mind, people, that I don't write about the crappy stuff - it's no fun and no one wants to read it. But. That doesn't mean there isn't any crappy stuff, OKAY?

Sneakypeek (such a cute name) wants to know if I wish I had a girl.
Can I just say...I cried when they told me Youngest was a boy. Youngest was supposed to be a girl. We plan VERY well and he was supposed to be a girl. But now I am NOTHING BUT PLEASED that I have no girls. I don't like girls very much - though I do wish I could dress one for a while...they whine and cry and manipulate and I am very very happy to be the only person in my house who does that.

Sharon wants my favorite childhood memory...
off the cuff I'd say there are two, no, three...
one: my mother walking us to see the snow falling in the middle of the night...we stood on the couch to look out the window. it was silent. and perfect.
two: my mother at a school play of mine. she looked incredible and I was so proud that she wasn't dressed like the other mothers.
three: visiting my grandmother's apartment. she was making us some potato salad but we were so hungry we ate the hot potatoes right out of the pot with salt and butter.
My father putting marches on the phonograph, my father in his sportscar printed boxer shorts, my grandmother taking me to see The Russians Are Coming...
I have many others. I had a lovely childhood.

Three from jlj:

1) Favorite quote and/or song lyric?
"Now comes the mystery." Henry Ward Beecher - last words

2) Favorite fictional character?

3) Favorite city?
Chicago, no, New York, wait...Paris...

So - a lot of questions...
on to the next -

Ssheers (I wonder if she is a hair stylist...) asks:
1) What were your favorite subjects in school? I liked english class in school. In college I loved my two-day-a-week, three hour class on Ulysses. I detested math.

2) Back before you had the mom-job, what kind of work did you do? I worked for a big publishing company, first in sales/marketing, then in production and finally, in my favorite job as a personal assistant to a hugely important, devil-wears-prada kind of boss. But I loved it.

Carol thinks she can sneak one in - she wants my first name, which she's not getting, and she wants to know if any of us are downhill skiers.
Sorry about the name thing, but I've worked hard at this and it's not going to suddenly be ELLEN'S blog now.
K is an extraordinary downhill skier - grew up on skis...never falls.
Oldest is a decent snowboarder, as is Youngest. Middle is not adventurous.
I don't think any of my kids have been on skis, but they've snowboarded a few times and liked it.
Me? I like the lodge.

For The Palinode I need psychic skills. He wants to know when he and his adorable wife are coming to dinner...
We love to have viviacious Canadians in to dine. What do you eat? Eh?
Sometime in the next couple of weeks?

Do I know RW? No matter - he/she wants to know if I've ever been to the west coast of Canada. Apparently the Canadians are here.
No. K has done some shooting there, but I've never gone with. Wouldn't mind - send a ticket.

Hello Onyx -
What non-essential item would I bring to a deserted island? Is there wifi? No? A notebook and pen.

Birchsprite wants to know the best place/country I've ever visited.
I do not know. I think I've loved just about everywhere we've traveled. And my answer would be different for city versus country - and hotel versus house...too hard.
The best place I've never visited is Japan. No, Australia.

Melani wants five secrets.
1. I think I don't like candy anymore.
2. I'm afraid of a lot of things I didn't used to be afraid of.
3. I don't read books.
4. I've never seen American Idol.
5. I am darker in real life.

My pal Paola wants to know if I would leave Tuvalu and move to Positano.
I am going to Positano in September, so, without a visit it's hard to say. For now I would say that I would love to live in a far away place (Positano would be fine) for two years and then go back to Tuvalu - I think it would be a great adventure. (Paola wants to trade houses, I think.)

Another Mary asks for one piece of advice/insight for parents getting close to dealing with teenage boyhood?
Stay strong, be honest and make a lot of rules. Be a person of authority, tell them when you are worried about something - have a curfew and demand it be respected.

Kelly wants to know why I don't like my dog and what Oldest is up to.
We got the dog for Oldest because he needed unconditional puppy love. I don't like animals.
She knows I don't care about her (don't pet her, don't talk baby talk in a high voice to her, don't snuggle her) and she does things to assert herself, like destroy things that mean something to me. We just aren't friends, but I'm not friends with any dogs in the whole world.
Oldest lives about 40 minutes away from here... as a live-in. He comes home every ten days or so and seems unbelievably happy. He drives small children to school, cares for two dogs, does the shopping and hauling and general house duties and seems to like it very much.
Last night, he gave me $40 for his cell phone bill. I like that very much.

Anonymous asks for five things that are always in my fridge:
I cleaned it out yesterday...
1. sun dried tomatoes
2. whole organic milk
3. Chilula
5. cheese, cheese, and more CHEESE

Juliloquy asks for some of my rules about clothing...
it's a whole post, it probably has been a whole post, but I'm too lazy to go look for it.
Here's three -
No leggings if you are over 25.
No armpits in the office or church.
No miniskirts over 36.

Jenny asks if we are beach housing this year -
we do not, at present, have plans to return to either of the beaches we love for 2007.
K is taking me to Italy in September and so, at this point, that's the only trip we have planned.

Jennifer asked these:

1. At what age did you have to explain the "birds and the bees" to your boys?
We told Oldest when he was six and we were having Middle - the other two learned when they were six too - at sunday school (with our consent and support) as UU kids learn about all that stuff in sunday school.

2.What are your thoughts on this as a mom of three boys?
Be brave, tell them early and be honest. I'd probably tell girls even earlier.

3. Give me one piece of advice mom to mom.
Trust your instincts.

Babelbabe asks: What is the average airspeed velocity of the unladen swallow?

Critical to this is the explanation of The Strouhal Number in Cruising Flight. 47 of the 74 worldwide swallow species are found in Africa, but only two are named after the continent. Of these, only the South African swallow comes close in its migratory path.

One may further speculate that, given an average body mass of 20g, and with a 28cm wingspan, the European Swallow would be capable of carrying much and that any payload would substantially impact its speed of 22.36 miles per hour, suspiciously close to the impact speed of falling off a 20 foot ladder.


Suse said…
I love that at the end of all that, you still had the strength to answer Babelbabe.

(You forgot to tell Mary that you have an imaginary GIRLfriend).
Badger said…
I MIGHT be going to BlogHer. Maybe. Perhaps. Possibly.

Hee! Ssheers is not a hairstylist.

You are much more liberal in your miniskirt rules than I am.
Anonymous said…
I felt like we just had that extra few hours at Starbucks. ;-)
Sharon said…
1. You are an amazingly persistent woman to answer all those questions at one swack.

2. Cholula on eggs! Yum!

3. I am so glad you didn't reveal your name.

4. Can I have your share of the candy?
Anonymous said…
Religiouly read all of the answers, which (of course) I appreciated in your usual nonchalant grace.
We'll talk about my question after you visit then, OK?
You were brave with all this answering.
Anonymous said…
Holy crap. You are amazingly diligent. wow. I'd hire you in a minute.
celestial opus said…
Thanks for asking what I was thinking Babelbabe. That is such a load off my mind!
RW said…
I too, am impressed with the diligence.

FYI - I am female. You don't know me. I think you would like my neck of the woods. You might be askance at the casual attire that pervades our streets - yogawear everywhere... but we have other redeeming characteristics.

Have a lovely day.
Anonymous said…
Hi Blackbird- I love your writing. You and I seem to have a surprising amount in common considering how very different our lives have been and are. Part of it might be due to the fact that you don't write about the crappy stuff. I admire that!I love reading about your boys because I have a very young son, and I know NOTHING about boys at all.
Anonymous said…
Thank you for answering. I hope you and K have a lovely time in Italy and maybe will send me a post card.
Anonymous said…
bb, I know the Q&A session is over, but I have a question I must ask you that has been niggling at me, and I have a feeling you've already worked it out for yourself. So. If you're willing to field one more:

Do you ever worry about infringing on your children's privacy when you write about them in your blog, even though you are careful about your family's anonymity? Sometimes I feel that when I write about my young kids I am exploiting them in some way. They haven't read my blog, but someday I suspect they will and might feel exposed. How do you deal with this?
Anonymous said…
Your bit about the English Patient reminded me of seeing it in the theater. After the end credits, I made a dash to the ladies room (8 mths pregnant), and while there I overheard two elderly women talking about the film. One, unbelievably, said, "so, who was the burn patient?" The whole film was lost on her. Three.hours.lost.
Anonymous said…
Thanks for answering all of our questions.

No, as Badger said, I am not a hairstylist.
Anonymous said…
What fun to read your q&a session.

I am slogging through a desk full of work here, and I wonder what an "assistant" really does, not in the movies or on tv. Because even though I have a fancy degree and some real skills, many days, I think that I would be better suited to "executive assistant".
blackbird said…
I used to think about my kids privacy more than I do now...I had to learn a balance -
looking back I do cringe sometimes (I shouldn't have run a photo of Youngest in the hospital, but I won't delete it either).
And my kids will sometimes say: don't blog this (as Youngest did yesterday in the hospital).
I don't run photos of their faces...
or their names...
I try to only be positive about them -
and I'm not terribly open about their daily lives. I think it's easier if they are older too.
After all, I'm not going to post about toilet training them or breast feeding them or run shots of their
cute little butts - I DO think
that posting that stuff is infringing...

Anonymous said…
Totally agree on low rise pants.

Wow, I miss a few days and a major q&a session!
Anonymous said…
Totally agree on low rise pants.

Wow, I miss a few days and a major q&a session!
Anonymous said…
Totally agree on low rise pants.

Wow, I miss a few days and a major q&a session!
Anonymous said…
Totally agree on low rise pants.

Wow, I miss a few days and a major q&a session!
Anonymous said…
Totally agree on low rise pants.

Wow, I miss a few days and a major q&a session!
Anonymous said…
Totally agree on low rise pants.

Wow, I miss a few days and a major q&a session!
Anonymous said…
Wow. I so disagree about girl-children.
Anonymous said…
Too funny! The last question you answered from Babelbabe is the question the bridgekeeper asks the knights before they can cross the bridge in "Monty Python & the Holy Grail". Did you really think that was a serious question bb, lol? Or is your answer a sarcastic response?

Those are my questions of you.

And it looks like Sarahlouise got a little happy on the 'Publish Your Comment' button!
blackbird said…
BB and I both knew what we were doing...
--erica said…
i like you so much.
Anonymous said…
delurking (at least i don't think i ever left a comment before..) to say THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS YOU DIDN'T HAVE A GIRL!!! MY DAUGHTER JUST PUT ME THROUGH H.E.L.L. LAST WEEK....she just turned 17. And here I thought my gay son was going to be the tough one....um...no.
Anonymous said…
Boys never put their parents through hell, huh?